Human Vending Machine

Human Vending MachineIn See-sawing back and forth across the City today with duties and appointments, I noticed the crazy drivers weren’t out like they were yesterday.  I happened to notice two accidents while out, as well as people not stopping at stop signs, texting while driving, and speeders.  When I speak of speeders, I’m not talking about the 5 – 7 miles over the speed limit, but rather the 10 – 15 miles over.  Another type of driver that I find exceptionally annoying are the tailgaters.  It’s bad enough they’re doing it, but when noticing them in my rear view mirror, they’re not even paying attention to how close they are.  They’re either fiddling with something or eating.  I’ll never forget as long as I live seeing on a regular basis a now retired Realtor eating french fries while driving.  I’m sure the interior of that vehicle must have smelled like the garbage can at the back of a greasy spoon restaurant.  I’m first to admit I don’t keep the interior of my car spotlessly clean, but one would likely not find food food droppings on the seats and floor mats.

I think yesterday must have been one of the weirdest days for all living creatures because while driving about 30 miles an hour down Hwy. 122, there was a bumble bee that was flying as fast and attempting to get in my car through the half cranked window.  I was quick to get it rolled up.  I didn’t think they flew that fast especially coming up against the wind resistance caused by my moving vehicle.

The market is still moving along briskly in these middle days of September.  In searching for something in the 40K – 60K range for a buyer I’m working with, there seems to be slim pickings of homes that are worthy of an investment.  They’re either in neighborhoods that people are steering away from, on small lots, or beyond hope in making any significant improvements that will increase value.  Some of those tired and worn-out homes seem to “wish” themselves to return to the earth.  Believe it or not, there were cheaply built homes over a 100 years ago just as there are inferior quality ones constructed today.  A dear friend of mine is bring one back to life that will be 100 years old in a couple of years and I assure you, that home is worth resurrecting.  The real hard maple woodwork and floors are going to be eye-poppers.

Today I managed to get another Realtor to laugh who’s been in the business longer than I have. We were talking about how the general public perceives us wrongly and I said, “If they only knew how our profession calls upon us at time to turn into human vending machines.  The public pushes one of our buttons and we turn into whipping posts, lawn mowers, snow shovelers, light bulb changers, bakers, coffee makers, furniture movers, floor sweepers, weed pullers, window washers, dust wipers, animal ka ka scoopers, counselors, advocates, garbage gatherers, filter changers, house watchers, ladder climbers, trash haulers, and everything else in between.”  She really did get a good laugh as well as myself because when I think about it long enough, I’d wager there’s not much I haven’t done in my line of work.  So whenever someone gives me that look of, “Oh, you just sit at your desk and wait for the phone to ring, show a home once, write an offer, get it accepted, and sit back and wait for the check to arrive.”, I’ll likely one day simply say, “How are your skills in becoming a human vending machine?”

Joe Chodur

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